2009-11-14 @ 9:42 PM
A Faint Light (A reason to be happy)
I...dedicate this post to a special person. I have no idea when will she have the time to read this, but I wanted this to look like a letter of sorts...
...because after all, its probably the only way I could tell her how I feel...
She was just a pretty face to me back then. I was out checking FS profiles posted on a certain site when I saw her on the list. I always have a thing on sweet smiles, and she happened to have one. While we do get into casual conversations on certain occassions, I never really thought I could get close to her.
...that was until one october afternoon, a text message appeared on my ever-so-quiet cellphone. A text message from her.
I am not supposed to make a big deal out of it. Its just a text message anyway. But before I knew it, we were exchanging text messages for 5 days. We shared some stuff about ourselves, some stories, some few jokes. It was a nice feeling...really, since I havent talked with anybody for that long, and I havent even had any textmates for the last 4 years (no kidding here). Not only that, would even log on to ym to chat.
Those 5 days are probably the happiest days of the season.
She came in such a way that it makes me hard to forget how she entered my life.
She`s a young lady who has a thing for Pocky, Rock music, and Shoujo manga. Has a sophisticated, level-headed attitude, but sure knows how to speak from the heart. She`s into reading and writing, and has good mastery (and strictness? lol) over the English Language (yes ma`am). She`s also a good confidant, able to give sound and rational advice for problems. And most of all...
...she was able to save a melancholic dreamer like me from a lonely dream. She might just be a faint light against the darkness of sadness I am currently in, but for me, that light is enough for me to continue believing that not all hope is gone...someone is out there to reach out to me. She is like a gift from God.
I guess you`re getting the message now. This is my way of saying `I like you` and `thank you` at the same time. Letters like these tend to send me in all sorts of awkward and undesirable situations, but this is where all my sincerity is laid down. This is where I am able to tell everything from the bottom of my heart.
A chatmate of mine once told me, ``do not tell a person you like her unless you are sure she`ll like you back. otherwise, you`ll risk of being busted.``
I`m used to being busted, really. Ive been busted for 3 consecutive times now. But for some reason, I cant seem to get enough. And at least for now, I know exactly what to do..
``I`ll use this feeling to help her become happy.``
Liking me back is a feeling that only she is entitled for. Of course, it would be nice if something like that would happen, but if not, then that`s okay, as long as Im able to help her in any way.
It was unfortunate for me that I am unable to help her in her current problems now. She has a battle that she still needs to conquer, and as someone who is more than willing to return her kindness, I want to help her in that battle with all I can do.
Also, I am getting the feeling that I am running out of time. The `countdown` looks like a time-vanishing spell for me, and I sure dont want anyone to just zap out without me doing something for that person. So while she`s still there...while we are still able to chat in ym...while we are still able to send text messages, I`ll make most out of the time.
Hehe, uber long post here. But this is me, really, the honest and real me.
If you are reading this, I am pretty sure you already know who I`m talking about. Yes, its you.
Thank you for entering my life. I will never forget you.
...and I will always pray for your happiness.
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