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He is a Dreamer.
He is a Melancholic.
He is a Fatalist.

He wears glasses.
He writes long posts.
He wishes for your happiness.

Black is his color.
Moon is his symbol.
Love is his essence.

He is Lezard, a mad lover.
He is Caius, a masked philanthropist.
He is Bren, a melancholic dreamer.

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November 2009
December 2009
January 2010
February 2010
April 2010
May 2010



Insane Nerd
Angel Tolosa, my daughter, for choosing this blog for me.

I am most proud to tell all ye, my faithful readers, that my January Week 4...

...is WTH Week.

Fate's a fuggin joker at times. And when it starts fooling around, you're doomed to experience the most unexpected circumstances. As for me, it made me run in circles AND squares just to get over the week. Truly astonishing. ~_~

Crazy School
This week, our School had its annual Lasallian Week event - a weekly celebration where all colleges "loosen up" on their hectic and toxic scheds and have fun. Ok, perhaps that's not what it really is, but that's how it appeared to me, especially when the professors bummed around, and the students start running around the campus in casual attire. I've got my ego diluted when I realized I'm the only student in the campus wearing school uniform and is waiting patiently and enthusiastically for the classes to start.

And did I mention how INFURIATED I am when I discovered that our STAT quiz for the week was postponed? I was looking forward to it like how I look forward to my wedding.

Call me killjoy or anything, but I didn't enjoy Lasallian week at all. I don't have company, I'm not a part of any program, I don't have any classes to attend to. Glad its finally over.

When My Sis Digivolved
My sister's been through a lot lately. Senior HS sure is tough, and so are the Entrance Exams. And wow...she's managing her last year without even worrying about love life at all!

I'm really proud of my sister. Yeah, I really love her. Even though she still yells at me for some reason, even though she keeps bossing me around, and even though she doesn't like the idea of me being an uncool brother, I still love her. And I'm glad she's becoming more mature than ever. n_n

The Way of the Bishiedo
I'm changing the way I look at myself.

Gone are the times of self-pity, self-doubt, and self-hate. It's about time I work on bringing out the best in me.

I've started taking care of my body now. If before, I'll just be contented with papaya soap every time I take a bath, now I'm actually using some skin care products to take care of my skin.

I'm also taking my gym sessions seriously and with enthusiasm. Coupled with Daily 30-minute aerobic exercise, I'm definitely aiming to have a body I am dreaming for.

I've been also practicing my smiles...and my social talkies. Socializing is an essential part of healthy living. Of course, with the connections I have, one can barely call it socializing, but I guess what I have now makes for a good starter.

Yeah...little by little, I'm slowly changing..."evolving" into a better me. I have a few people to thank for...for giving me this much inspiration. Yep, I'm not only doing this for myself. I'm doing this for all the people I love. n_n

=====================================

January Month-End Report

Health: *****
Money: ***
Social Life: ****
Love: **

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See you in February, dear reader! n_n

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Not everything turned out too well this week. It seems that my own incompetence and carelessness have brought me more trouble than I could handle.

I focused too much on "HOW TO BE HAPPY" - as a result, I have neglected some vital aspects in my life.

MMORPG vs. Studies
Who haven't heard the tales of the endless war that these two wage.

Destiny Online is so addicting. The cute graphics, simple gameplay, and uber-amusing missions and quests made me stay for several hours everyday. But even with it, I was not satisfied. I downloaded two more MMORPGs (Atlantica Online and Perfect World) just so I can get maximum satisfaction.

Turns out, playing TOO much of these games robbed TOO much of my time that's supposed to be spent studying.

Due to this, I almost got a failing mark on our recent Asian Civilization test. I had a little trouble our Stats, SocialPsych, and Zoology quizzes too.

Not only that, I've been dozing out an awful lot on my classes as well. Playing up until 1am surely isn't good for one's rest schedule.

There's no other solution here but to lessen my gaming. I know its gonna be tough, considering how "heated" I am with the games, but Midterm examination is just around the corner. Gotta pull myself together.

Screwed the Gym Homework
Ok, this one's immensely serious.

There's no problem for me if what I am only going to deal with are studies and written projects, but physical workout...well, that's another issue.

Our professor in Adaptive PE told us we're not going to conduct our class for the week to give way for our week-long set of projects, one of which includes a visit to the gym to conduct a workout program consisting of 50 sets of workout exercises.

I committed a mortal sin called "Planning Fallacy", cocking out that I will be able to deal with the exercises 3 days before the submission of workout report. I DIDN'T EXPECT GYM SESSIONS WOULD BE THAT HARD.

...or perhaps I just visited the wrong gym, which was a rundown, limited-spaced gym with a "im-not-sure-if-he's-really-pro" gym instructor who has a smaller body than me.

Now I've only got two days...and we know how gym workouts hurt on the succeeding days. I have to take this seriously, else I MIGHT get transferred back into Swimming.

Have You Forgotten You're the SECRETARY???
PREX-related problem here.

I was assigned to a lot of tasks for the next seminar...well, just as everybody, I guess.

I dunno...perhaps its just the feeling of pressure getting too much into me. We've only got 12 members organizing the next event, and we're supposed to get 25+ participants for the seminar. We need to collect funds, figure out how and which meals will be served, deal with the morale of the participants to motivate them to stay and complete the 3-day seminar.

I guess pressure is normal, as far as organizing an event is concerned. But dealing with it is something that I need to work on, and fast, else, there won't be any more reliable people who can support our president.

=====================

So yeah, learned some valuable lessons this week.
1. Prioritize the MORE important stuff.
2. Never get to cocky with stuff you are not sure of.
3. Be responsible with the roles and tasks given to you.

I won't be committing the same mistakes this week. That I promise. n_n

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The stuff that I had in my last post where carried over to last week. It was nothing that I did not anticipate...after all, those were big things...things that will probably stick with me for several more months.

More PREX!
My new community has been busy lately. 2 days after our graduation, we had our first reunion...a formal one, that is, and an event that is facilitated by the very people who brought us together. And a reunion with an election? Yep, we had it, and I was elected as Secretary for our batch. Looks like I will be more busy than ever, with an additional role to play in the world.

Work-out + Slimming Tea = I'm Serious. I'm gonna get fit!
Christmas season almost brought me back to my plump figure, but good thing is, I got out of the foody-dreamy syndrome before anything happens. So yeah, I'm back with my HipHop Abs Workout. I'll be making visits in the gym as well, perhaps at least once a week. Also...as absurd as it may sound, I'm trying one of those slimming teas being shown in the commercials. I've read they help with constipation and digestion...something that MIGHT help me get fit. Hopefully, all of these would work for me. This whole idea is one of the highlights of the "Love Myself for My Loved Ones" campaign. n_n

5 People's Birthday Party is a Community Reunion
For the weekend, I attended a collective birthday celebration of 5 of our co-members in Japinoy. Ok, Japinoy is an online community consisting of people from around the country who like anything Japanese. These 5 people decided to celebrate their b-days on one jam-packed occasion, and that eventually became the forum's first reunion for 2010. Also, the event was the first party I attended this year (yeah, I didn't attend any parties since December 31, 2009---not even a New Year Party). Considering how attached I am to most of the members of the said community (especially to one of the b-day celebrants) I considered it an honor and a pleasure to be one with them on that special night. n_n Guys, happy birthday! n_n

Am I Happy?
If you believe I am, then I probably am.
Time is indeed an enemy, and an ally at the same time.
The paths where fate has lead me has brought me here.
Your words, your silence.
My hope, my sanctuary.
I have my caring hands reaching out to your wounded heart.
Even though your moonlight radiance shines that of a joyful flicker.
We both are steering the wheels towards a new horizon.
Can we do it together? As friends?
If you believe I can, then I will.
Because I believe you can, and you will.
Are you happy?
If you are, I am.

(that's a pretty messed up piece of whagamama literature. but hey, that's something that came from my dodecahedron-shaped heart. lol)

Week 2 was a wave. It was just a ripple in the first week, and now, we're seeing some REALLY significant changes in my life. Whether this will continue for long...is something that only God knows.

Catch ya later guys! I'll be waiting for your posts too. n_n

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Hello there, my dear readers. (yes, you two. LOL)

It been a while since I had my last post here. I wasn't particularly busy...just not in the mood to write, since my readers are busy and might not have the time to drop by.

Anyway, we're back. n_n

The first week of the year was fantastic. I couldn't believe my life would get into this much rolling after a semi-depressing year. Let me share 'em. n_n

GOOD GRADES IN THE PRELIMS
I passed all of my exams last prelim period...and with some shocking news. I managed to get the 2nd highest score for Zoology and got the highest score in Statistics. I. CANNOT. BELIEVE. IT.
You guys know how I feel towards these subjects, and I am VERY surprised that my efforts would grant me such rewards. Its fulfilling. Looks like I have to reconsider my thoughts on these guys. Not all is impossible, as they say. n_n

A NEW MMORPG
Even as a self-proclaimed hard-core gamer, I still find MMORPGs a little frustrating. It takes too much effort to play, not to mention it requires you even to play with other people in real time. However, things changed for me when I tried "Destiny Online". An MMORPG with simple game mechanics but provides the same amount of fun and excitement any online gamer would enjoy. And I LOVE wasting my time on games like this. This is a good stress-reliever for me. I'll be sure to find some new friends too while I'm on it.

PARISH RENEWAL EXPERIENCE
Last December, I was invited by an old friend to attend a "weekend seminar" scheduled on the 5th of January. He told me that it has something to do with parish work and stuff. I was reluctant to agree at that time, but seeing how enthusiastic my friend was to invite my, I didn't turn down the offer and decided to join.
It was more than I expected. A 3-day seminar, with 11 complete strangers, listening, sharing, working, and having fun, together, as brothers and sisters, creating a new family and becoming new members of a working church community. Its thanks to this seminar that I got new friends, got the chance to apply the paradigm shift, and even got the time to find myself through Jesus Christ. Truly, God knows how to play His cards. He's so cool. n_n

A NEW LOVE?
----NONE---- LOL. n_n
No, really. I dunno what's happening in my life now that I'm meeting some fair amount of cute girls recently. There's one in every place I stay...although not all of them are all close acquaintances.
I still need time. To think about things. To love myself. To reconsider my past. To find a reason to embrace tomorrow, and the love that was destined for me.
Moving on is still quite a wonder for me. There are times when I think I am ready to fall in love again, while there are times that I want to cherish what I had in the past, and dream for miracles to happen. That's just the kind of person I am...an honest dreamer, a lover of memories.
Perhaps now, I know what I really want. I want to love myself first, so that I would be able to bring happiness and strength to anyone who needs it. Its not about finding a girlfriend or a companion...its about loving a person from the bottom of your heart because you care. Yes, I honestly do believe this is what my heart speaks at the moment. I sure hope you find your strength too.

YAY! I'm less talky this time. This was such a fun week, and I'm hoping for this coming week to be just as great.

Thanks for reading. I'll be dropping by your blogs soon (if you'll post, that is. n_n)


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