2009-12-04 @ 2:03 AM
Level 2: Failed
I was pretty confident with what Ive practiced last week. How come I ended up failing my first practical exam?
I say I have enough determination to take this class to the next level. But this time, its my health condition that went against me...
and sadly, thats not something I could control by myself.
I was placed in an awkward position in the line: I was among those who were lined in the 6ft.
It was hard to protest against my position...there`s like 30 something students in our class, and I wouldnt want to act like I`m someone special. Besides, I really thought that I`m going to make it, although I was having some second thoughts as to how exactly am I going to make it...
We were told to do the straight body gliding in combination with flutter kicks...and once we get to the line, we`re going to backfloat our way back to our initial position.
I was uncomfortable with the water...I found it too high for my desired `comfort` level, and that brought my `nervous` rating by another point.
I became much more uncomfortable when I started feeling something on my throat. This is
level 2, and if I fail to make myself calmer, bad things will happen to me underwater (I ate spaghetti before the session).
I still went on to perform, despite what I am already feeling, but just as expected...
I failed.
When I reached the middle part of the water, my body suddenly froze. I couldnt move my muscles as I wish. It was too late when I realized that I am already running out of breath...tension within myself makes it hard for me to reach the surface. I almost drowned.
``Absent ka ba last time? Didnt we practice how to do the technique?` is what the professor semi-angrily told me after I was saved by my classmates. I couldnt give a proper answer...I was too busy catching up my breath while trying to suppress the painful jolt in my chest. I wasnt able to participate well in the remaining parts of the session because of it...
...as if thats the worst already. A few minutes after I was relieved from the class, I felt an extremely painful gush of blood up my head. I could have sworn I saw myself winced for a moment. After that, all that is left is an aching sensation up my head...and it stayed, even until now as I write this post.
I didnt know my body was this bad. Sometimes, its not enough that you have an optimistic attitude on things...there will come a time when certain limitations will still get in your way. According to my professor, what I felt was just anxiety affecting my total performance, and that its not life-threatening at all. I`m certainly not going to debate it with a swimming instructor, but then again, I know myself better than anyone else...or so I think...
Short post here. I`m disappointed and depressed over this failure. I can get over this feeling for a short time, but that wont make things easier...
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